Corrupt-a-Wish

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Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:46 am

Welcome to the official Night Ops Corrupt a Wish thread! For those of you who know how this game is played, feel free to skip to the bottom. For everyone else, read on: Corrupt a Wish is a simple game that starts out with a poster making a wish. The next person to post after him or her must somehow "corrupt" that wish, so that if said wish was granted, the poster who made the wish would end up getting the opposite of what they wanted. Twisting the wish around in an ironic or humorous way is encouraged. I'll give an example, and then I'll add a wish of my own. Good luck!
First poster wrote:I wish for a brand new car of my choice.
Second poster wrote:Granted, but you lose all four limbs in a driving accident on your way to pick it up from the dealer. I wish I could have sex with a supermodel.
Third Poster wrote:Granted, but she gives you every STD known to mankind and you suffer from premature ejaculation. I wish for... ECT
And that's pretty much how the game works. Now...

I wish for immortality and eternal youth.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:50 am

Granted, but you lose all of your senses.

I wish to have an unending source of money.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:59 am

Granted, but this source of money relies on you violating yourself with dragon dildos of increasing size on live webcam.

I wish I could turn objects of my choice into gold.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Nigma » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:16 am

Granted, though the process is only complete after passing through your large intestine.

I wish to regularly lose my balance and fall, ass first, in an endless field of enormous phallic genitals.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Eden » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:21 am

Nigma wrote:Granted, though the process is only complete after passing through your large intestine.

I wish to regularly lose my balance and fall, ass first, in an endless field of enormous phallic genitals.
Granted. Each one of them has a different STD, which they have now given to you.

I wish for a pony.
I'll tell you a secret...The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:31 am

Granted, but you can only ever talk to Bronies for the rest of your life.

I wish I could be a night opper.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Eden » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:38 am

Granted, but you can only op in a lime green jumpsuit with bells sewn to it.

I wish I owned a house.
I'll tell you a secret...The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:44 am

Granted, but it's a miniature with 30 square feet of space.

I wish I had super strength.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Eden » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:45 am

Ghost wrote:Granted, but it's a miniature with 30 square feet of space.

I wish I had super strength.
So a Beeriam house then. Of course.
I'll tell you a secret...The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Wed Apr 03, 2013 6:57 am

Ghost wrote:I wish I had super strength.
Granted, but your strength is uncontrollable. Have fun masturbating!

I wish I had magic powers.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Lady Nym » Wed Apr 03, 2013 8:45 am

Xanatos wrote:
Ghost wrote:I wish I had super strength.
Granted, but your strength is uncontrollable. Have fun masturbating!

I wish I had magic powers.
Granted <3

I wish the guy I like would notice me...



Did I do it right?
Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all that's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess,
It's a love story baby just say "Yes".

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Wed Apr 03, 2013 8:48 am

Granted.
Image


I wish I could fly.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Wed Apr 03, 2013 8:58 am

Granted, but you can only do it naked and with your eyes closed.

I wish I was the greatest night opper that ever lived.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Eden » Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:05 am

Ghost wrote:Granted, but you can only do it naked and with your eyes closed.

I wish I was the greatest night opper that ever lived.
Granted, but you now have a facial tattoo.

I wish I had money for rent.
I'll tell you a secret...The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Wed Apr 03, 2013 3:55 pm

granted but the cops think you stole it, you are now in jail.



i wish i was >hazgunz
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:55 pm

Granted, but you can only have one and it is a Mark 1 Gyrojet pistol.

I wish I could become invisible whenever I choose.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:05 pm

granted but you become paralyzed when you become invisible

i wish i could read minds
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by MasterBro » Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:07 pm

Granted, but whoever you're spying on will always be talking shit about you.

I wish for the ability to tranfrorm into whatever I want.
A war for peace is a contradiction.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by MasterBro » Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:08 pm

Roxas wrote:granted but you become paralyzed when you become invisible

i wish i could read minds
LOL that was meant for the one just before you... but it kinda fits anyways :)
A war for peace is a contradiction.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Thu Apr 04, 2013 3:38 am

Granted, but it takes a month for the transformation and you have to do a silly dance. Naked.

I wish I could cast magic.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Thu Apr 04, 2013 8:39 am

Granted, but your manna source is your own life energy; the more you cast, the quicker you die.

I wish I could control the flow of time.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Thu Apr 04, 2013 7:36 pm

granted but the more you do it the slower you become

i wish i could single handedly kick north Korea's ass
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Thu Apr 04, 2013 8:11 pm

Granted, you shall now have one of your hands removed.

I wish I could understand every language and speak them all fluently.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Thu Apr 04, 2013 8:42 pm

granted but you now suffer from extreme stuttering

I wish i had all my dream opping gear and the best camo ever
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Fri Apr 05, 2013 1:48 am

Granted, but you become a Norwegian scientist who works in Antarctica.

I wish I lived in the Zone.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Fri Apr 05, 2013 3:44 am

Granted. Now get out of here, stalker!

I wish I had both the philosopher's stone and the elixir of life.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Fri Apr 05, 2013 12:58 pm

granted but your the last living thing on earth


i wish i could be a storywrite about opping
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Sun Apr 07, 2013 4:11 am

Granted, but you can only write in Chinese Braille.

I wish I was dead.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Mon Apr 08, 2013 1:30 pm

granted but i bring you back from the dead as a zombie whore slave

i wish i had aids
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Tue Apr 09, 2013 1:25 pm

Granted, but they find the cure and save your life right after a related infection makes your dick rot off.

I wish I could "save game" and "load game" in real life.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Tue Apr 09, 2013 2:29 pm

Grante#/CORRUPT_SAVEGAME
---#ERROR
---#REALITY COMPROMISED


I wish I had a pair of my favourite handguns that would never jam and would never run out of ammo.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Tue Apr 09, 2013 2:40 pm

granted but they weigh 400 pounds each

i wish i have a roof burrito
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:12 am

Granted, but after you eat it you can never leave the roof.

I wish I had a knife that was impossible to break, never lost it's edge, and never rusted.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Wed Apr 10, 2013 8:07 am

Granted; it's Pyramid Head's greatknife from Silent Hill 2 and doesn't have a sheath.

I wish I had superhuman eyesight; able to see clearly in all lighting conditions and spot the most minute details from far away.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:23 pm

granted but you just died

i wish i could get off the roof.
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by sinista » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:24 pm

granted but you have to jump
i wish i had a bigger dong

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:26 pm

Granted. But it's so big it's like having a dead siamese twin attached to your groin, and it requires so much blood that you pass out whenever you get an erection.

I wish Roxas doesn't survive that roof jump.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by sinista » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:28 pm

granted but a mad scientist reanimates his corpse

i wish i had a hot korean girlfriend

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:29 pm

granted but she nukes you.
i wish i had my 72 virgin women
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:30 pm

Granted, but they're all Justin Beiber fans and you're stuck with them for ETERNITY!

I wish I could extend my life indefinitely.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by sinista » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:31 pm

granted but you're locked in a crypt for eternity

i wish i was stronger

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Roxas » Thu Apr 11, 2013 12:32 pm

granted, but you have arm cancer. amputation for sure


iwish i had herpes
The problem with trying to be the bad guy, is that there is always someone worse

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Urgon » Mon May 06, 2013 10:23 pm

AVE...

Granted, with incurable rotting body parts twist...

I wish I had a lockpick set...
"We sleep peaceably in our beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on our behalf."

Airship pirate...

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Xanatos » Tue May 07, 2013 8:20 am

Granted, but they're implanted close to your heart (Saw-style) and you have to surgically remove them with a ballpoint pen.

I wish Kouta Hirano would hurry up and finish drifters so Studio Madhouse can get around to animating it.
We are all books containing thousands of pages and within each lies an irreparable truth.
What is locked, can be opened. What is hidden, can be found. What is yours... can be mine.

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Wed May 08, 2013 12:46 pm

Granted, but it's done using stick-figure animation and nothing else.

I wish I had a beer.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Thu May 09, 2013 1:55 am

Granted, but it is made from a new method using horse piss and tastes exactly like that.

I wish I had a wish granter.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Urgon » Thu May 09, 2013 3:55 am

AVE...

Granted, but it's jackass genie type...

I wish I spoke fluently in COBOL, Klingon and Java... .D
"We sleep peaceably in our beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on our behalf."

Airship pirate...

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Teutoni » Fri May 10, 2013 8:50 pm

Granted, but you just lost your tongue and eye.

I wish the site had an explosion of new members.
Keep 'em chained, boys!

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Ghost » Fri May 10, 2013 10:13 pm

Granted, but they're all clones of Atarii-XV.

I wish we were all transported back to Europe circa 1400 AD. With gear.
"A man's greatest treasures are his illusions."

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Re: Corrupt-a-Wish

Post by Nukes » Sat May 11, 2013 5:01 am

Granted, but our time machine has a malfunction and we land in the prehistoric era with the dinosaurs and you forget your knife in your pants at home.
I wish I was never threatened to be perma-banned again.
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